And Tits -- George Carlin Tribute Beer

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"There are 400,000 words in the English language and there are 7 of them you can't say on television. What a ratio that is. 399,993 to 7. They must really be bad. They'd have to be outrageous to be seperated from a group that large. All of you over here,you 7, Bad Words. That's what they told us they were, remember? "That's a bad word!" No bad words, bad thoughts, bad intentions, and words. You know the 7, don't you, that you can't say on television? "Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, CockSucker, MotherFucker, and Tits" Those are the heavy seven. Those are the ones that'll infect your soul, curve your spine, and keep the country from winning the war. "Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, CockSucker, MotherFucker, and Tits" Wow! ...and Tits doesn't even belong on the list." --George Carlin

As you may know, Drew and I (and especially Drew) like to do tribute beers when people we like die. We're getting ready to brew up the fourth year of Gonzo -- the Hunter S. Thompson tribute beer with rum, tequila, bourbon, mushrooms, hemp and poppy -- among other adulterations. Drew brewed a tribute to Michael Jackson. Well, when my hero George Carlin died, I contacted Drew and he felt just as strongly -- we had to brew something. We went back and forth (for months) on the recipe almost going for an imperial Irish stout before settling on a very bitter big Irish red with American yeast. Figured that was a good translation of Carlin into beer. The name? I think Drew's calling it "Carlin's 7," but the actual name is "Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, CockSucker, MotherFucker, and Tits." "And Tits," for short.

Aiming for a 1.087 OG, we wanted a lot of yeast. You're looking at a 3-gallon carboy sitting on a stir-plate filled with Wyeast 1272 (American Ale II). We went with 1272 because while it's still a neutral American yeast, I feel it accentuates the malt a bit more than the hops. Which may work with our Irish/American hybrid.

That's me starting to vourlaf. Our grain bill consisted of 40% Marris Otter, 40% US 2-Row, 5.75% Caramel 60, 5.75% Munich 8L, 4.25% Caramel 120, 3% Biscuit and .75% Carafa II. Seven malts, get it? Well, that's what it was supposed to be, but we screwed up and added two pounds of Biscuit. C'est la vie! I believe this grain bill is loosely based on AleSmith/Jamil Z's "Evil Dead Red" beer, but obviously pumped up. We mashed it at 151 for about 70 minutes. Now you hear from a lot of people that tell you to just pull off the first quart or so when you Vorlauf and then begin collecting your sweet wort in the kettle. Speaking for Drew, we feel different. In fact, depending on the beer, I might recirculate the entire volume of the mash tun twice. Why?

Here's the wort after a gallon or so has been recirculated. Yeah, it's free from particulate matter, but it's still a bit murky.

And here's that same wort after we've recirculated 20 gallons or so. You tell me which you'd rather runoff into your kettle. Yes, it takes longer. But so what?



Not to belabor the point, but I (and we) just think this is the superior starting point. And it costs you nothing but time. Plus you'll get better efficiency and fewer tannic-causing particles in your beer.



It's always teach a friend to homebrew day! That's Dr. Drew on the left and my buddy Josh Liberman (no relation, spelled different) on the right. Josh's first brew. He did real good.



There's Sven and Amy adding some hops. Oh yeah, we hopped this guy with 3 ounces of Chinook for 71 minutes (George died when he was 71) to make it as roughly bitter as possible. We added a 3 ounce blend of Columbus, Warrior, Chinook and Cascade at 15 minutes and another 3 ounce blend of Chinook, Amarillo Gold, Palisade and Simcoe at flame out. Seven kinds of hops...

Drew finally busted out his ThruMometer. Pretty fricking (excuse me Mr. Carlin fucking) handy actually. The Thrumometer is showing the temp post wort chiller. The handy part is being able to adjust the out valve of the pump so as to maintain a temp around 68-70 -- good for pitching. Anyhow, the beer's fermenting away. The only bummer was that we missed our gravity by quite a bit -- something like 15 points (Target was 1.087, OG was 1.072 or so). After thinking about it we've narrowed it down to three culprits. 

1) Drew's grain mill is set poorly (I don't think that's it)

2) Somebody weighed the grains out incorrectly

3) Drew's cheapo stupid braided SS hose (instead of a manifold) got crushed by the 35.75 popunds of grains or got twisted in some way.

I'm not mad, just disapointed, as it was an otherwise flawless brew day. Er, OK, fine -- forgot to add the Whirlflock. Bite us.